Right now, it's late at night. Dexter is sleeping and so is Suzie. I just got home from doing emergency babysitting duties (no need to worry, seems ok now). Now usually, I don't write from a father's perspective, but I think after this past week, I felt a compulsion to do so.

As you may know, the Kim family (Kati, James, Penelope and Sabine) were lost in the Oregon wilderness for a time after the Thanksgiving holiday. Katie, Penelope and Sabine where miraculously found on Monday, but unfortunately, James did not survive their ordeal. Here's a link if you want to see their website:

Kim Family Link

Although we do not know them, it's hard not to think of the similarities: young parents, young children (even their youngest is the same age as Dexter), techies (please note that I can only loosely be referred to as a techie), etc.

What's hard for me as a new father is to think of the difficult decisions James had to make. Sure it's easy to second-guess what he "should" have done, but that's an easy thing to do while having the luxury of sitting at home and pondering. I think the heartwrenching thought is the fact that James went out alone to try and help his wife and two daughters after waiting for help for over a week. After agonizing about what to do, they made a decision to look for help. James decided to do something, anything, to try to help his family. And there is an infinite sadness with the thought of him being alone in the wilderness, not knowing how his family was doing makes my heart heavy. I hope he rests in peace and that his spirit will live on with the knowledge that his wife and daughters are alive.

What would I have done? I don't know. I really don't. And I don't want to think about it. There is a quote that I say to Suzie time and again that even prior to this tragedy, brings tears to my eyes and even now as I type it, makes me sad yet hopeful, "If I told you we were off to sea, in a bottomless boat you'd try anything to save us, you'd try anything to keep us afloat...and if we were living in a house afire, I don't believe that you would rush out and escape it and not rescue me". The point is that I would do anything in the world to make sure that my son and my wife were safe. What exactly that means, I'm not sure because I hope I never have to make the same decision that James did. What I do know is this: this ordeal has reinforced my will to love every moment I have with my little family. Kiss my wife a little more, snuggle with her in bed a little longer, love her even more, sing to my son, play with him, listen to him laugh. Just savor every moment I can with them as much as I can.

I love my wife and son with all my heart and soul.

Ramon